Hollywood has been mutating our understanding of love for a long time. We have this idea that we give our hearts away to someone and we depend on that person to protect it. Essentially, we are at the mercy of this individual. What I’ve learned from meditation is that love is the opposite of vulnerable. Love is grounded, safe, strong, and independent. When someone has a pure mind they are able to love unconditionally, and unconditional love only flows in one direction.
I’m not pretending that I’ve got this all figured out. If someone close to me betrays me, I feel hurt, but at the end of a course, when my mind is the most pure, I can feel the warmth and support of the vibrations of metta that have nothing to do with verbal relationships. At these moments, I’m aware of what some advanced meditators may feel all the time.
So are true relationships risk free? That idea feels like a bit of a stretch, but in my experience since becoming a meditator, almost all of my personal relationships are open, honest, and safe. I also don’t need as many relationships because I’m able fulfill more of my needs internally.
Maybe love is a whole lot simpler than we thought. Maybe love is simply the vibration of a pure mind, and possibly pure minded people tend to attract other pure minded folks into their life. Maybe all the relationships of a strong meditator become healthy and energizing. Maybe this is an oversimplification. Time to meditate.