If you’ve been reading this blog from the beginning, you may remember my mental struggles regarding returning to the dating scene after spending 7 months at Dhamma Patapa. The crux of the challenge was figuring out how to stay committed to my five precepts and 2 hour sitting practice while participating in the dating scene. I wanted to have fun without drinking, explore intimacy without sexual misconduct, and appear interesting and cool without lying. Basically, I thought I was up against an impossible challenge.
Well, within a month of retuning from long term service I met a girl on a meetup.com hiking trip. The beginning stages were awkward, as they always seem to be, but dhamma had my back. After meeting on the group hike we started exchanging emails and had reached the stage where we could either stop talking and move on or make ourselves vulnerable to the joys and pains of a new relationship. Dhamma decided to make the choice for us by miraculously having our paths cross in town. We took this as a sign that we needed to explore a deeper relationship. Even if it was chance, I’m glad it happened!
I was honest about my meditation practice from the beginning, and while she was unsure of the importance of Vipassana in her life, she always respected my need for it in mine. I was also very careful, and still am, to share aspects of my practice that interest her but not to try to force dhamma into her life. She sat a course about 10 months after we met and continues to sit about 1 hour a day. She hopes to sit another course this summer. I’m very happy that she has grown to value Vipassana for herself rather than meditating for me. From the beginning of our relationship she did prioritize encouraging and supporting my daily practice and this made a world of difference.
So now we are engaged to be married, and I couldn’t be happier. Dhamma has helped me to create a wholesome and complete life, and I’m excited to discover what dhamma has in store for our future together. Time to meditate.