How Quickly The Ego Can Return

Two weeks ago I started to notice a smile on my face while I was meditating. Several days later I found my intuition was becoming more clear. I felt good again. Good like the old days. I noticed a little bounce in my step as I adopted some of my strength from the past.

But today I’m realizing that it’s not strength at all. It’s my ego returning. I observed myself closing my heart and pushing forward because that’s what I used to think confidence was. The humility and openness which was guiding my growth was disappearing.

Today I tried to humbly return to the discomfort of vulnerability. In this vulnerable space is where all the growth takes place. Letting others see this vulnerability is true strength. The “good old days” are in the past and it’s wonderful that I’ve discovered a way to grow beyond that space. In order to experience the purity of love I need to open my heart and dissolve my ego. I need to trust in dhamma and the path that it’s leading me on.

I will continue to discover how opening up is impacting my relationships with family, old friends, and new friends. I look forward to discovering the beauty inside of those whose paths I will one day cross. The future will remain bright as long as I remain humble, open, and full of love and compassion. Meditation can help.

This entry was posted in Personal Experiences by Ryan Shelton. Bookmark the permalink.

About Ryan Shelton

While I'm currently married to a beautiful woman while teaching physics at Padua Academy, these descriptors fail to capture the totality of my adventurous life. I have hiked over 1700 miles, traveled to 5 continents, managed a bakery, started a meditation center, counseled troubled teens, attended Duke, UNC, and Harvard, protected forests as a wildland firefighter, volunteered thousands of hours with Americorps, rafted the Grand Canyon, SCUBA dived on the Great Barrier Reef, and continues to find new adventures. I hope my writing encourages you to pursue your dreams and be the best version of yourself while supporting your communities to work together to solve the current challenges in our world.

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