written by Sanjeev Prasher from Amritsar, India
I observe that vipassana students generally shy away from discussing or accepting the truth about these two things- ‘Money and Sex’. I have been practicing vipassana for the last 10 years and observe that our interest decreases in sex as we make progress on this path. It also creates problems in balancing our married life as it is also our duty to fulfill our partner’s needs. Our partner may often complain about our diminishing interest in this sensual pleasure. I always try to fulfill my partner’s sensual needs but it becomes a difficult job as one progresses on this path.
Now, coming to money- a question keeps on pricking us quite often that how much money should we have while following this path. I feel that money is no less than poison. One should have only that much money which can fulfill his/her personal and family’s material needs. But, at the same time it is difficult to define the word ‘needs’. what is luxury for one may be a need for the other. I feel that money should be sufficient to fulfill our basic needs like food, shelter, clothes, education, transportation. Besides, one should have some money for emergency medical needs. Beyond that, it is all greed. People generally say that life has no meaning without money. But, I feel that money creates more problems than it solves. It is also a cause for many vices in the society.
Please share your views on this topic.
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Living Vipassana 
Today returned from doing a 10 day course. I thought of avoiding for a day so that the Dhamma vibrations spread in the house. But we could not live without having sex.
I was 27 in 2001. Before that I had done a 20 day and 30 day course. I was doing a new job in New Delhi. In first few months itself I had lot of experience where unknowns of both gender tried to lure you to fall on the wrong path. Moving . To be safe I thought of getting married. Marriage did not last for more than 11 months. With my salary I could not fullfill her desires and expectations. She had done 2 or 3 courses at that time. We used to live in one room, kitchen, bathroom house on the top floor in a 3 story bunglow. I moved to Chandigarh with new job, where I had 2bhk, it further created problem as job demand was more and also the desires increased. Her father is SAT now.
In 2007 I got married again. While expecting first baby wife did the only course in 2008, she was positive but did not continue practise. About a month back took admission for 2.5 years and 4.5 years kids in school. I felt that kind of school with admission fees and huge yearly fees was not required, which my wife could not understood. Instead of spending 5000-6000 dollors a year it could be done in 2000 dollors.
Not sure one has to be equally grown in Dhamma / Vipassana to balance sex and money. I feel so, but my parents who are also Vipassana practioner does not. May be because of society and religion there thought process is different. Doing number of courses is also not the right parameter to understand if both are equally grown in Dhamma. It may be a seed of Vipassana for me in this life and for someone else already walked on the path and developed.
Will time find and send more thoughts and experience on the course.
Thanks for sharing. These are complex issues and it’s nice to hear you honest experience dealing with them. I look forward to hearing about your most recent course.
It’s totally wrong, a man practices Vipassana can live good Grihasth life. No problem regarding money and sex both. It’s very good path for the humanity.